My Story – How do I know about the Alcohol Trap?
Well, I fully understand the struggle to stop drinking, and I was well on my way to being caught in the trap! Even now, in my age group, my demographic, and my country of origin, I am probably still stuck deeply in the trap.
Only thing is – I escaped! I got out! I am no longer stuck, or trapped or threatened or feeling guilty.
And I feel great!
Now, I never like to dwell on the negative, but in this case it is necessary to let you know where I came from, and why I am so excited to share my success with you.
I drank every day for 25 years, give or take a few (days that is, not years…) Sure I thought I was in total control – but maybe I never was. Maybe I was deeply in the trap – but I never knew it, and I would never have admitted it!
My Early Exposure to Alcohol
Like most red-blooded young men, my early social experiences were based around drinking, and of course this was part of being cool, being accepted, and helped to cement my place amongst my peers. So I can’t criticise any one for having a drink, nor do I preach that youth should not drink.
Beware the trap….
Yes I had a drink to feel a part of my peer group. Yes I would have two drinks to keep up with everyone else. Yes I would have another because it felt good. Next I would have to have as many if not more drinks than everyone else, just to prove how “good” I was at doing it. And I was not likely to back down from this challenge or any other challenge, and nobody wanted to be the first to stop drinking.
My trap was set….
My Adult Exposure to Alcohol
My childhood was privileged and fulfilled. My career has been successful and certainly keeps me busy. My marriage has always been full of happiness and contentment, and many years later, I view as my most important achievement. More recently, my children are stimulating, demanding, and fill up all of my spare time with pleasure and adventure. So why the hell did I start to drink alcohol? Why the hell would I need any other stimulant in my life? Why the hell did I waste so much time? Why the hell did I need to drink Alcohol at all?
The trap was closing around me….
The Warning Signs…
By way of proof that the trap was closing, I can recall a couple of stories that might ring some alarm bells.
During pregnancy, my clever wife was steadfast in her determination to stop drinking alcohol so as to not inflict any chemical or drug damage on the baby’s development. (You can read Sonya’s account of this Here) Of course, I appreciated that this was the smart and sensible thing to do, and being a participative husband, declared that I would support her in this initiative. After all, pregnancy was one of the most important milestones in out married life. Yeah sure, I managed for one or two days to stop drinking – but nothing significant over the full term. So what’s the problem you say?
We have three kids! And I could barely manage to stop drinking for a couple of days over the course of all three pregnancies…
Sure I could stop drinking at any time (even if I didn’t want to)….
So if I am honest, there would be many examples of where I had good intentions and motivations, but not so good at actually doing it.
Have you ever tried Dry July? How about OctSober? How about Dry January. Yeah sure, I tried to stop drinking for a worthy cause, and nearly made it a couple of times! Became a bit of a joke actually, that I was likely to fail, and just pay the fine.
Not funny. Not cool… More evidence the trap was closing….
Was I Feeling Threatened to Stop Drinking?
As long as I thought I was in control of my own destiny, I was not directly feeling threatened, and therefore I was never under any pressing need to change. There it is – I said the word CHANGE. If I kept going the way I was going, I felt increasing waves of guilt and inadequacy. Not spending enough time with my kids, not being productive enough at work, allowing my health to steadily deteriorate, noticeably putting on weight, losing the ability to respond to any of the above…
Ever increasing feelings of guilt and inadequacy… The bet way to overcome the guilt was to drink more – Uh oh… I think I might be stuck in the Trap….
Lucky for me, my clever wife never actually demanded that I quit drinking completely, that would have been WAY too threatening.
There is a Solution to Stop Drinking
What my clever wife, Sonya, did instead was to do exhaustive research of her own into the subject of ways to reduce and control alcohol, in the quest to stop drinking. She will tell you herself that she was much more vocal than I about her wishes to manage her intake of alcohol than I was. She’d tell me her latest plan for reducing intake, and also lament to me when it failed. I was (quietly) fighting my own battle for supremacy over this habit of regular indulging and never said too much. I guess I feared there may be request or demand that I quit drinking completely, to help Sonya achieve her goals, but thankfully she never put that pressure on me. That may have been way more than my Aussie male ego could have handled!
What we realized, after we’d happily and comfortably and somewhat ‘easily’ decided once and for all to stop drinking and not have alcohol as part of our lives at all, was that we’d been through a series of phases and steps to get to where we are now. It didn’t just happen. It took time (lots of time) and setbacks and feelings of guilt when habit and everyday stresses prevailed over good intentions. I silently studied, absorbed and tried out everything Sonya told me about and tried herself. Fortunately for me, the solution was readily and easily available through this process.
We traveled our paths alongside, but fought our own battles separately to get where we wanted. Sonya because she perhaps knew I would resist her requesting me to cut back with her, and me because I didn’t want to commit to anything I hadn’t decided on for myself. Now that we found a process to stop drinking, we now ‘love being alcohol free’, and we support each other, so that’s partly why we wanted to reach out to others and offer our method – and support – to those traveling the same journey to a clean, fresh, healthy and bright life.
And I certainly hope my life story may have helped you to seek out a solution to stop drinking if an alcohol dependency is causing you misery.
Reducing Consumption or Stop Drinking
I have tried through out this story to be non-threatening in many of the statements and descriptions I have made. But here is a doozy. Cutting back just will not cut it… There I said it – reducing the amount or cutting back on drinking days is merely a way of using denial to fight the trap. But you are still stuck in the trap… The best way to cut back on drinking is to quit alcohol completely.
Alcoholics Anonymous
I am sure nearly everyone has heard of AA, and for better or for worse, we probably all have an opinion of the type of people who require the brilliant and caring resources of that organisation to stop drinking. However, do you realise that it only has a reported success rate of around 5-10% for how to help someone stop drinking? There is a reason for that disappointing result – it is that AA depends on willpower, and The Alcohol Trap, as I call it, fights harder with won’t power! No matter how strong the denial, ordinary willpower is no match for the trap we step into when we take a sip of alcohol.
I don’t know about you, but denial alone would never have allowed me to admit that I had a problem, nor that I needed help from any organisation, let alone attending group therapy, deprivations, and ever more guilt loading. No way. Let alone the time out of my life to go and attend the meetings. I needed to find a way to quit drinking without AA!
Expensive Alcohol Rehab
If I had a choice, I would never go for this expensive, embarrassing and very public form of denial…
Luckily – There is a Better Way
No I was not and am not addicted, and yes I did have control over my own life – and I want to share the good news with you also.
This method to stop drinking is unique…This is truly the best way to quit drinking, with no fuss!
• There is no need to declare yourself an alcoholic.
• It is a permanent cure, not a lifetime struggle to stop drinking.
• There are no group meetings or expensive alcoholic rehab sessions.
• There is no humiliation, no pain and 100% no ‘will-power’ required.
• It treats the source of the problem, not the symptoms.
No, you don’t have to share your life story with everyone to be judged or ridiculed.
No, you don’t have to live with increasing feelings of guilt and inadequacy.
We can show you how to stop drinking in the privacy of your own home, with simple and easy to use tools, we can show you how we gained our lives and happiness and freedom back.
Stop Drinking with NO FUSS
But you have to be willing to change some things. For example, how you see your relationship with alcohol. How you see your relationship with yourself. And how you want to control you own destiny. How do you want your kids to grow up and manage their own relationship with alcohol?
If you really want to – you can stop drinking and escape from the alcohol trap.
How is my Life Different now that I have stopped drinking?
I changed my life easily and simply – with no fuss. I wanted to have more quality time with my wife and family, so that I wasn’t locked in to a cycle of demand and supply, so that I didn’t need to feel guilty any more. It worked!
My happiness levels have increased enormously.
No more guilty feelings – did I say that one already?
I am still too busy to exercise as much as I would like. Since I figured out how to stop drinking, my blood pressure has improved such that I no longer need medication to control the problem. Since I quit alcohol, my cholesterol has also reduced back to acceptable levels.
And the best part – I figured out a bullet proof way to stop drinking and I am so proud of myself!
You wouldn’t believe the level of self satisfaction that I have derived from the simple act of taking back control over my consumption of alcohol.
How can I help? I can show you how to Stop Drinking Now!
If you have read to this point, I apologise for my rambling story, and for any threat that I might have implied to your lifestyle and well-being along the way. This has to be the easiest way to quit drinking! It is also the best way to stop drinking on your own!
But I make no apology for offering you this solution – I simply ask that you have a read of our free eBook “Why Your Attempts to Cut Down on Alcohol Haven’t Worked, and What to do Instead” by entering your name and email address below, and I wish you luck with your individual journey to stop drinking.
Regards,
Tony